Have you imagined what life would be like if your spouse died? It’s only recently that I have pondered that occurrence. I’ve been lucky enough to be married to the same man for 49 years (I still don’t believe that could be possible) but recently I have been worried about his health and what it would be like if he were not here. Does that resonate with you?
My husband is obese, has Diabetes and is non-compliant when it comes to checking his blood sugars and following a Diabetic Diet. And his A1C is over 8, and that really scares me. He’s already been thru open heart surgery to fix four blockages, a stent put in two years later, and now is experiencing shortness of breath. So back for more tests and another possible surgery. Things are happening that have me worried and I am starting to feel afraid that I could lose him.
The most frustrating part is that I know what he needs to do to improve his chances of living longer and healthier but I can’t get him to do it. I’m sure it hasn’t been easy for him living with “Nurse Wellness” since he’s addicted to junk food and doesn’t want to change from pizza and hamburgers to whatever I have concocted that is super healthy and not loaded with sugar and grease. A definite dilemma, but it doesn’t mean that I give up trying to change him, despite knowing you can’t change anyone but yourself.
I will admit I have had to get sneaky over the years trying to trick him into adopting healthier eating habits. For example, when I started my own wellness business with a focus on nutrition, I really learned the facts about using “food as medicine” so I was very motivated toward helping him lose weight, bring down those blood sugars and maybe get off of the many drugs he was on.
One of the programs I had at my disposal was called a Sugar Cleanse and it was part of a weight loss program, so I thought this would be perfect for him. It consisted of replacing meals with shakes for 5 days, taking vitamins twice a day, eating nutrition bars in between meals and after 5 days he could lose 5 pounds. But how to get him to do it?
Step one. I knew that he had loved having milk shakes as a treat, so I suggested he might like to try one of my nutrition shakes. And guess what – he liked it! Step one was accomplished and he was willing to drink a shake every morning for breakfast.
Step 2. Getting him to take the vitamins. He was already taking medications for his Diabetes, so what’s a few more pills? I told him they had been giving me more energy, I felt better and was sleeping better so he decided to give them a try. So I added them to his pill box and he took them all together without flinching. Just a few more pills – no big deal.
Step 3. Getting him to do the 5-day Sugar Cleanse. Since I hadn’t tried it myself, I wanted to know what it was like so I could better support my customers about what to expect. I also knew that it helps with weight loss and blood sugar control so I asked him to do it with me and he said YES! And he agreed to check his blood sugars during the 5 days to see if it was working. NOTE: I believe that even tho he originally seemed to be resistant to changing his lifestyle toward more healthy living, he really did want to get healthier but didn’t know how to proceed. Sometimes when something comes along that sounds like it could work and is non-threatening, people jump on board. Timing is everything!
And so the experiment began. Day one his blood sugar was 180, and by day 5, it was 90. He was thrilled! And guess what – he lost 11 pounds over 5 days to my 5. Yes, men seem to lose weight faster than women – not fair! Now he was on a roll and stayed on a modified version of the program for the next 6 months, lost over 40 pounds, got off of his blood pressure and cholesterol med and one of his Diabetes meds. And felt a whole lot better and became a believer in eating “low glycemic” foods for weight and blood sugar control. So being sneaky and trying to trick him into making some healthy lifestyle changes may not seem fair, but a girl’s got to do what a girl’s got to do. And in this case it worked.
But now for the rest of the story. I wish I could say that there is a happy ending and he stayed super healthy for the rest of his days. But truth be told, this plan worked for several years but gradually his food addiction sneaked back in with his old habits and he gained all his weight back and finally ended up taking insulin for his Diabetes.
So here we are again, back at the beginning. However, this time we’re older and now I’m worried that his life could be in jeopardy. But my nature is not to give up. Especially when I know the results he had before were spectacular and life saving. I am also armed with success stories from other clients who use this program and are healthier and extremely grateful to have found something that works, when all the meds in the world have not helped. Even one man was able to drop his A1C from 8 to 5 and resolved his Diabetic Neuropathy! And again I am amazed at the power of “food as medicine”.
So rather than giving into the fear of the “inevitable” with my husband, I prefer to take the high road and become the “trickster” again and try to work my magic once more. After all, he is worth it and the path of healthcare with all those drugs and procedures should be the “path less traveled”. Wellness is the way to true health and longevity.
Do you have a spouse or partner who has health issues you wish you could change and how are you handling it? Please share your stories.